Whelmed

I’m not a big fan of leaders who do not inspire others. That may not be fair; but candidly, I do not care. Serving as a leader, at least to me, requires some level of connection to the broader team (peers, superiors, subordinates) beyond simple authority.

That connection signals you are not only working hard, but you have something engaging about your leadership style that shows others around you that you are worth paying attention to…and following.

Being knowledgeable is obviously important, but is that the most important part of effective leadership? Maybe not. The best leaders I’ve worked for had a fire inside. They made me want to do more, take on more projects, stretch myself, and think bigger about my future. Imagine if everyone you worked with felt the same way? How would your organization perform?

We’ve all worked with leaders who are decent people, know generally what to do and how to do it, yet there is something missing. They could easily be one of a thousand other nondescript leaders.

They are…whelming.

Don’t be them. Find your voice. Get fired up about your people…your organization…your path forward.

Thanks for being here.

Jay

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I Know

I'm not sure where to start. 

It's been a couple of week since the world, literally, shut down. I've had so many emotions that I don't even know how to frame them...process them...or take charge of them.

At least, sometimes I don't.

I'm worried about loved ones, and colleagues, and friends, and...everybody. That feels like a lot.

At least, sometimes it does.

I started a new job a few months ago. Then the world changed. I was still trying to figure out my new normal. Now I'm figuring out a newer normal. It's odd. Swinging between big ideas and plans for taking over the world...to struggling with the reality of that invisible enemy can be overwhelming.

At least, sometimes it is.

Somewhere in this mess we can't lose sight of the people on the frontline..in hospitals, as first responders, the researchers, the delivery people, the store clerks, the clergy...and on and on. They are risking so much...and I feel like I'm not doing my part.

At least, sometimes I do.

I'm thinking about you all my friends.

I'm thinking about the opportunities we have to provide inspirational leadership.

I'm thinking that prioritizing people is probably the most important thing we can do...it might just be our historical legacy.

In fact, I know that is true.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Finding A Way

All things considered, life is pretty easy, don't you think?

Of course it isn't. Sometimes it's hard as hell.

Pressure
I don't know about you, but I feel a tremendous amount of pressure in my life. Some is self-inflicted, some is based on the nature of the work I do, and some is just unnecessary. 

But it's there. Every day.

Am I doing a good enough job at my firm? Am I maintaining important clients? Am I bringing in enough new ones to take care of our team and hire new employees as we grow? Have I addressed every single issue that has been thrown my way?

Sometimes it feels like a bit too much. Often times it feels like...well...a bit too much.

Pain
Then there's that other emotion...the one that surpasses pressure, whether it's in our professional lives or our personal ones. You know this one too...it's the disappointment when we stumble. It's the hurt when we make a mistake that is often huge in our minds, but isn't quite that big in reality. It's letting someone down when we really never intended to do so.

Resilience
Amongst all of these swirling feelings, we find something. It's hard to describe and nearly impossible to quantify. Yet, it's there. We can feel this one too. It's our ability to pull from somewhere deep inside and marshal onward. Often times with unexpected confidence.

Where did that come from? Why didn't it make an appearance at the beginning of this journey instead of at the perceived low point?

How About You
How do you 'handle' it all? Is it easy; or, do you find yourself in a dark place that does not have a clear path out.

Until it does.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Finding My Way

I'm not exactly sure when it happened, but I've found myself in somewhat of an awkward place. 

Professionally, I have a terrific job with a company that is being recognized in the industry and growing fast. I love human resources work...it just matches everything that I believe is important about the life and success of an organization. 

That all sounds pretty good, right?

But...
Somehow, though, a cynical view has snuck up on me. 

I don't like that. 

I don't want to be someone who complains about the complainers. I don't want to sound like the angry guy who is just another know-it-all. I don't want to be someone who isn't living the way he truly wants to live.

So...I'm doing something about it. A huge part of my personality is based (often times as the brunt of jokes) on being overly positive. Sometimes even missing the reality of a situation because I refuse to see anything but the positive side!

That personality trait...that I have relied on to carry me through for so many years...has become a bit more elusive lately. 

I don't like that either.

Getting Focused
I'm going to dial-in more than ever to what used to be my default reaction, to an intentional, thoughtful response to the world around me. 

Staying positive has to be the starting place. 
Staying positive has to be my go-to style. 
Ending positively has to be the way.

Maybe this all sounds hokey. Probably true. But for me, taking a proactive approach to how I live my life versus my "life living me" is essential. I've taken big steps in my health, faith, nutrition and fitness. Now it's time to lock down the last and most challenging part...

...my mindset.

How About You
What has become elusive in your life? What behaviors have crept in that you want to lock down? Don't be afraid of confronting them...you can do it!

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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This Is Not the Edge of the World

The rollercoaster world of work is...

exhausting.
exhilarating.
maddening.
exciting.
frustrating.
rewarding.
the worst.
the best.

No matter what it is for you today, remember you're not living on the edge of your world. It's just the thrill of the ride. Hang on tight in good times and bad, and embrace every minute.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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New You? No Chance, Right?

This is not a New Year's resolutions post. Here's why...I don't think you're going to keep any of yours. January 1st has nothing to do with changing your life.

I'd rather talk about a hardcore commitment story. It's about someone who struggled with weight, self-control, their career, and self-esteem.

Until that someone decided to completely commit to a new life.

Early Excuses
In the beginning it wasn't hard to justify the behavior. When you're young you can bounce back from bad food choices, lack of exercise, and being undisciplined at work. The excuses come easy, and there is always 'plenty of time' to get back on track.

Along with the excuses came professional highs and low, and a waist line that seemed to follow. At some points reasonably fit...and at others...well...not so much.

Manic Excuses
As the realities of getting a bit older set in, the hyper-focus on fitness took control (in a bad way.) The workouts, without regard for injury or fatigue, became the norm. So did the pain from overuse injuries. Again and again and again.

As the self-esteem went down...the weight went back up.

Surely this must be bad luck! Or life's cruel twist? But there was more to come. 

One day, most unexpectedly, a phone call came through describing a dire situation. Not soon after, the Father was gone at 61. This was a devastating loss which sent this cycle into overdrive. Food, excuses, training, injury, low self-esteem.

Repeat.
Repeat.
Repeat.

How About You
I'm happy to report this person is doing extremely well today. A complete and total commitment to a new way of living was not just necessary, but required.

The focus on eating clean, training hard, a disciplined approach to work, and respecting the limits of what one's body can handle (usually) are now part of a consistent and high energy approach to life.

In short, I'm doing better than I have in years.

So, as you look forward, regardless of the date on the calendar, I hope you too will find the balance, discipline, and drive to dominate every part of your life. I believe in myself now...and I believe in you too.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Over and Out

"No problem, I can handle it."

"I like the chaotic pace, it keeps me motivated."

"I'm not sure what's happening, but suddenly I don't feel the way I used to."

"I've had enough...this is not worth it."

Popular Issue...For A Reason
The burden of pride that often convinces the overachievers among us that we are invincible has a significant downside. The self-talk that normally keeps us on track and fuels our ability to power through difficult moments can sometimes get us into trouble.

Yes, I'm talking about the impact of stress in our work lives. 

Why am I bringing up a tired and often written about topic? Because it's the topic that keeps on giving! Pretending to be above it all; or, to state that we don't have time for stress to affect us simply exacerbates the problem.

Stress is real...for you and me...and needs to be managed effectively particularly if we're going to live up to all of the self-hype that is going on between our ears every day.

Effects and Management
The Mayo Clinic has a quick reference web page that discusses the fundamental impact of stress on us...as well as some action we can take to counteract it.

Whether it is your body, mood or behavior stress can creep in and change us. I personally find that somewhat disconcerting! But recognition of the impact, as well as some quick fixes such as various forms of exercise, mediation or if problems persist a consultation with a health professional, can provide some relief and get us back on track.

How About You
Are you invincible like me? (insert epic eye roll here) Guess what, neither one of us are immune to the effect of too many issues hitting us all at once. Take a few minutes to learn about the signs of stress and stay one step ahead.

I'd love to hear from you

No Excuses.

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(I'm Not Your) Scapegoat

Let's be honest for a minute. Leading is hard. Sometimes impossibly difficult to the point that despite our best efforts, we simply don't know what to do in the moment. When we're dealing with a crisis, or a struggling team member, or external pressure, we can fall into the trap of identifying someone as the source of our troubles versus understanding all of the facts first.

Rookies Are Obvious
This behavior happens most commonly when new leaders (from supervisor to CEO) are not comfortable handling confrontation. These well-intended folks typically do not understand that because they are uncomfortable with a situation, it does not mean they are supposed to rush to judgement simply to make themselves feel better. 

These are usually the same leaders that are passionate about culture, and teamwork, and advocating for an environment that is supportive, open and innovative. Here's the catch...because they are not willing to push themselves into areas where they can manage their discomfort, they end up looking foolish.

Consequences
Leading the way to make changes for the better is admirable. However, avoiding the hard work necessary to understand issues before making judgements; getting (more) comfortable dealing with perceived problems slowly and methodically; and ensuring that the messages delivered to the team are well thought out and clear are absolutely essential.

Here's why...no one stays if the leadership team of an organization behaves like a bunch of rookies.

How About You
What new leaders are struggling in your company? Who needs your coaching and support; and, who needs some candid feedback about how they are really perceived? It's up to us as leaders to stand alone and make it happen.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.



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Toxic Sleep

I've spent years working out....and stopping...then starting again. It's not an uncommon cycle for many of us. I tried various strategies, programs and tricks to keep myself motivated. None of them had the staying power to help me move from being a "talker" about fitness to actually becoming committed to my health, until the summer of 2013.

Physical Health Is Not Enough

If you asked me if I knew working out and eating clean were good for me I would obviously answer yes. But if you asked me if I knew how to commit to being healthy I would only recently be able to answer.

That's the funny part. My brain knew the right answer, but I did not fully realize the powerful difference eating clean and regular exercise would make in my life.

For the last fourteen months I've had a different answer when I'm asked about health and fitness. 

Life Is 90% Mental

My transition from knowing I needed to workout, to understanding that I needed to be committed every day has changed me.

Completely.

My world starting moving faster than ever before. Yours may have picked up speed too. Balancing the many hats we wear in life, managing nonstop changes in the workplace, and pushing myself to take on new challenges for the first time in my career all happened during this period of time.

...but I couldn't figure out how to quiet my mind when it was racing with so many thoughts, ideas, and pressures.

...but I couldn't find the right formula to balance my energy for the responsibilities I had to deliver on.

...but I couldn't "do fitness half way" and find any peace.

Peace.

So I went all in. I realized the combination of eating clean, a decent amount of sleep, training at a high level, and pushing myself harder than ever before actually brought a sense of calm I had not experienced in the past. 

Think about that for a moment. My commitment to health actually slows my life down, gives me some control, and brings me peace each day.

How About You

What techniques do you use to quiet your mind? Do the vices in your world include a commitment to building energy through hard work in the gym or at home with a DVD or workout routine? 

Is your network part of your fitness lifestyle? Do you fuel your body to build the energy you will need to be successful? Or, do you allow stress to be a convenient excuse to sit on the couch and make unhealthy choices.

Find some peace today.

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Arise and Purify

Sometimes we find ourselves feeling...well... stuck. It often comes in waves. Work gets complicated despite our best efforts to add value...we miss more workouts than we should... and personally life seems a bit off track.

We feel low. I hate that feeling.

Arise

When was the last time you decided to stand up for yourself?  What was the tipping point that made you realize you needed to take action? Doing something, even what most would consider a small step, can do wonders for your mindset.

Don't let others define you. You know who you are and what you have done and will continue to do. Stay true to yourself. Lead with that attitude!

Purify

Once you've allowed yourself to focus on you, block out the noise from those who judge you unfairly. Create a plan to literally move yourself forward. 

Maybe that is a new way to manage your workload; maybe it is a transition to integrate technology into your world; or maybe it is time to find a new job that will meet your personal and professional goals.

Allow yourself the freedom to go for it. Recognize that you might feel nervous or afraid. That's okay. Allow yourself to be overwhelmed with the fear of an unknown future. That's okay too.

There is nothing wrong with fear. But there is something wrong with living a life where you never stare fear down and take control.

How About You

Today is your day. Not tomorrow, not next week, and for God's sake not during New Year's resolution season. Today. Arise and purify yourself.

 

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Headbanger

As you look at your task list or calendar each day, what goes through your mind? What emotion hits first? Does your competitive side see a challenge; or, does your heart race as you realize it will be nearly impossible to accomplish all of those items in one day? 

DERAILERS

Lately I've been wondering how that first rush of emotion impacts our mindset at work. Is it possible that our style leaves us susceptible to a first impression that will be a derailer on our outlook for two, six, or even twelve hours?

If so, what strategies do you use to counter this load of negativity? Banging your head against the wall may be tempting at this point, but I recommend head-banging for something very different. 

FIND YOUR RHYTHM

I have three approaches for dealing with work, personal, and often times in-my-head stress that can derail me and put me into a bit of a tailspin. These won't work for everyone, but in my world they have made all the difference.

1. Reach out to my network

This may feel a bit awkward, particularly if you're not calling to "talk shop." We can all slip into the "work is stressful can you believe what she said in the office" discussion. I'm talking about opening up...being vulnerable...and letting your network actually offer some perspective.

It's powerful. It's important. It works for me.

2. Workout like a beast

Okay, I realize not everyone is into getting fit. That's okay...life is about choices. For me I need to workout to stay sane. I'm not embellishing here. Exercise has become such an important part of my mental health that I can not go more than a day without it.

It's powerful. It's important. It works for me.

3. Find the music that brings me peace of mind and play it every day 

I don't know too many folks who do not enjoy music. Check out the #HRMusicshare hashtag and you'll find all sorts of people sharing the music that is helping them get through the day. My personal tastes are at the fast and heavy end of the musical spectrum. So what?

It's powerful. It's important. It works for me. 

HOW ABOUT YOU

How do you react when the day ahead looks like a train coming straight for you? Do you give up before you even get started...accepting failure as part of the routine? Or, do you make an intentional decision to do something that works for you?

Rock on friends!

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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