Now that's an odd title, don't you think? Of all things to be discussing on a human resources leadership blog...self interest?
Them, and Me
One of the challenges I face in my leadership practice is balancing my nonstop desire to push harder, faster, and better than my competition; and, understanding that the risks involved with my leadership personality can create casualties.
Casualties, on my team.
Understanding my role when mistakes are made, as well as the others involved, is more complicated than it sounds...at least for me. You see, I have this fairly large ego that continues to get in my way. My intentions are good, and often the results are rock solid, but it's the occasional collateral damage along the way that is unacceptable.
Is every miss my fault? Of course not. But every one of my reactions is completely on me. No one "forces me" to react too strongly. No one requires that I have a quick response that sometimes could be perceived as harsh. I am the only one who has the power over my responses.
When I find myself moving too quickly (which happens a lot) I need to build a new step into that frenetic pace. A step that allows me to ensure my words match the situation. And when I miss the mark, or realize that even though the "other person" made mistakes, I still need to lead the way.
I need to lead the way, every time.
If we think about forgiving those around us that make mistakes vs. running them over with our frustration and disappointment in their performance, a couple of interesting things happen.
First, forgiveness is not about the two people involved exclusively. Forgiveness is about resetting how the world is supposed to work, far beyond individual relationships.
Second, forgiveness, through that re-alignment, creates opportunities for individual forgiveness to be effective and long-lasting.
How About You
Is forgiveness a sign of weakness, or an attempt to simply 'forgive and forget?' We actually never forget; but when we focus on a more global reset, along with the individual healing that goes along with it, we demonstrate for our teams that forgiveness is actually a powerful leadership tool.
What do you think?
I'd love to hear from you.