Wednesday, July 18, 2018

It's Time to Suffer

"I'm not good enough."

"I'm not going to get that new job."

"I really messed up that relationship."

"It's my own fault...I just can't handle all this pressure."

"I'll never have an opportunity to get ahead here."

Our Mind: Friend or Foe?
The often discussed - and even more frequently "heard" - minds of ours can be so powerful that we sometimes get lost, literally, in them.

I try to use my self-talk machine to help me stay positive, fired up for each new day, and to keep moving forward. I'm obsessed with constant motion.

However, that does not mean that those voices in my head don't do their best to derail me and turn me into a quivering mass of jello.

Self-talk is powerful. 

No, We Aren't Supposed to Suffer
For some reason when we stumble, the thought comes into our heads that we must be punished. Why is that?

Guilt?

Sadness?
Resentment?
Disappointment?
Embarrassment?

It doesn't make any sense. Yet, I completely understand why someone might feel that way...because I have felt that way too.

What is it about "not being perfect every time" that makes us think we need to experience emotional pain or stress? 

Have we set such unrealistic expectations of ourselves that each mistake or wrong decision must be punished?

Whoa! That is a lot of pressure!


How About You
How do you handle setbacks or disappointments, particularly when you have contributed to them? 

Does your mind kick in to overdrive and begin the attack on...you; or, have you developed a way to sidestep that very human reaction, and follow a different path?

I'd love to hear from you.


No Excuses.

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Monday, July 9, 2018

The HR Clique

Whoa! Wait just a second...a clique for HR? Impossible...we love everybody, you know...the employees, people...and stuff. Right?

The Gig is Up
I may be venturing onto thin ice here, but it seems to me something has changed in the HR space as the world of social, blogging, and conference mania has hit full force. 

While some have passionately reached out to embrace other members of the HR community, particularly new professionals...something else has happened. 

A club, of sorts? A group of close friends? A public sub-culture that speaks to an elite group of HR pros?

I'm not sure...


Growing Pains of HR or Arrogance?
Some professions have to go through a period of discovery before they are fully accepted by the other, more traditional professions (law, medicine, finance, engineering, etc.)

Is that what HR is doing now? Perhaps all of our seat-at-the-table whining didn't pan out the way we hoped, so we've turned to something else?

Are we trying to be too hip? Too trendy? Too awesome for our own good?

I'm puzzled friends. What's even more puzzling is the role I've played in our "growing up" process.


How About You
What do you think about the current state of our profession? 

Is it one of inclusion for all of us; or, have we somehow created our own class of elites, that makes sure to remind the others of their proper place in the hierarchy?

I honestly don't know...but...


I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Thursday, June 28, 2018

Absolutely Positive!

I write a lot about leaders striving to be better (including me!) Often those messages are embedded in real life examples of leadership failures (including me again!).

But here's the thing...so much of what happens around us...to us...and for us...is because of...

...us!

All In My Mind
I am often 'accused' of having such a positive outlook that I don't have a real grasp of reality. I LOVE THAT! So what it is that has made the Jay-Filter so effective despite problems, stress, mistakes, pressure, even bigger mistakes, and failure?

Every corporate setting I've been exposed to (large or small) comes with a dose of the aforementioned challenges. Dwelling on those problems, for some, is a competency they have perfected after years of practice.

I don't love that.

However, finding the opportunity in every problem that blows up in our face...seeing the potential...interpreting the chaos as a challenge to be world-class...is something that has made an enormous difference in my life, both personally and professionally.

Stop It
Have you practiced your negativity skill a bit too long? Is complaining about everything that is wrong with the world your comfort zone?

Why?


Does it make you feel better?
Does it improve the operations of your organization?
Does your team create amazing results because of the negative environment?


Um, no, no and no.


How About You
Life is full of negative things...that isn't going to change. What can change however is what you do about them. 

Get fired up!

Laugh off the madness, and charge ahead (even if you don't know what to do next)!

...and most of all...find the good each day! It's all around you!

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Thursday, June 21, 2018

Rocking Chair Leadership

"I'm on it!"

"We're moving fast on this one!"

"The team is all over it!"

"Everyone is so busy working on this!"

I.
Don't.
Believe.
You.

Activity Does Not Equal Progress
How many leaders have you heard describing how 'busy' they are; or, their teams are? How many times did you hear those same updates week after week with no real progress to show for it?

That drives me crazy...

...particularly when I do it. 

Lots of Hustle (sort of)
Back when I coached youth hockey we had a player on the team who always looked like he was skating hard and trying to make an impact. He was really busy out there! 

However, he rarely made actual contact with an opposing player, never ventured into the corners, or God forbid, stood in front of the net to endure a cross-check or two.

I meet a lot of leaders like that player.

Their calendars are jam-packed. Their list of meetings is endless. Their Inbox is always full.

But nothing gets done. Ever.

How About You
Who on your team is that little hustling skater who never makes any big plays? 

They probably believe rocking back and forth all day in a rocking chair actually gets you somewhere!

Oh, and, why do we seem to continue to allow that lame leadership style to continue?

I'd love to hear from you.


No Excuses.
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Thursday, June 7, 2018

Rockstars Want to Work for Rockstars, So Build Your Personal Brand

Recently I had an opportunity to be a guest on Jeff Hyman's terrific podcast - Strong Suit! Jeff and I roared through the show so quickly I couldn't believe it ended so fast.

Here's the kickoff to the show...click the link below and give it a listen!

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STRONG SUIT - we only recruit rockstars

If you hope to have even a prayer of recruiting Rockstars, you'd better be one yourself. 

Because they simply won't consider working for someone they can't learn from, grow from, and one day replace (you, when you're promoted!)

So to do that, you need to communicate to candidates that they'll be working for a top performer...




...and as always...

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Failure Is Not A Competency

Proclaiming one's failures seems to be a trendy thing to do these last few years. It's an odd thing though, at least it is to me.

I get the whole "learn from your mistakes" angle...but, really...relishing in one's failures?

Lower the Bar
I'll be honest here. I don't want to fail. In fact, I get upset with myself when I stumble, let alone fail. I'm sure you do too.

Maybe, we have embraced failure as way to limit expectations of ourselves and our colleagues?

Maybe we have socialized failure so heavily, it is now more important to "own it" when we fail vs. being held accountable?

Maybe we need to stop making excuses about weakness, incompetence, and yes, failure?

How does that sound?

Harsh or Honest?
If you've written off today's post as a rant, think again.

How is failure treated in your organization? Do those leaders who struggle continue to stay in their roles, all while your senior leadership team preaches accountability and upholding corporate values?

You can't have it both ways.

Maybe what's happened to the corporate world is that we're all so fearful of employment litigation, that we've made it okay to hide behind excuses to be weak and indecisive? We see it a lot...so...it must be true.

Right?

How About You
How are you addressing failure and driving accountability into your organization? Is it working? What has made your approach successful?

I'd love to hear from you.


No Excuses.

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Tuesday, May 22, 2018

#MeToo Is About Everyone

Anger is rampant. Accusations are rampant. Accountability is rampant. Men are running for cover, and women feel more empowered than ever before. 

It's embarrassing that in a country with as much potential as the United States, it's taken this long for these voices to be heard. It's also embarrassing that men continue to behave this way.

When we consider the racial and religious divide that has been reignited and supported over the last two years, it's a miracle that anyone dares speak out.

What Is Happening?
Has something fundamentally changed? Have centuries of abuse, harassment and a male dominated society finally started to crumble? Has the pendulum swung so far and so fast that no one is entirely sure what the 'new normal' looks like?

I don't have the answer.

But I do know one thing...


"We are not supposed to be afraid of each other."


I've heard that men are afraid to mentor women? 

What?

I've heard that men are not sure how to behave around women? 

What?

I've heard that women and men are being so cautious, that it is impacting how and when work actually gets done.

WHAT?!


The Missing Piece
Where is the leadership? Why isn't someone offering a balanced point of view? Why isn't someone demanding civil discourse on these complicated issues? Why are men running scared, when they should be standing up and making their voices heard in support of their colleagues, friends and family?

Where are the powerful male voices supporting #MeToo?

Mainstream media doesn't provide any leadership from the left or the right.

Political leaders who have the most influence are clearly falling short.

Many companies espouse "equality" and "value their employees" but I see precious little in writing, and even less 'action' from their leaders, taking a stand.

Who, then, is going to lead the way? Here's the answer...you and I are going to do it. 

We are going to have the difficult conversations. We are going to write in a calm, thought-provoking way to ensure opinions and ideas are heard. 

We are going to listen to each other. 

We are going to be role models for our children, our employees, and our leaders.

You and I are going to lead the way.

How About You
How do you feel about our world? Does your company's leadership team openly discuss these challenging issues? Is there a candid conversation occurring in your organization that sets an example for us all? What about you...how are you leading the way?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.