Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Regrets Have No Value

Ouch.  Really?  No value?  That’s right, none.  How many of us can change anything in our past?  Anyone?  Can we learn from the past?  Sure we can, I do on a regular basis.  Do I sit around wallowing in self-pity because I didn’t always make the right choice or that I wasn’t picked first in gym class?  No…that would be lame, and I hate it when I’m lame.

Regrets Are Like Excuses
Now before you think I’ve morphed into some sort of insensitive lout, please keep this in mind.  I am a bit of a control freak (and I mean that in the most positive way of course.)  So if regrets fall into the category of things I can not control, then I have no interest in spending any time on them.  I’m into learning, getting better, and taking action.  Unfortunately for many people in the workplace, regrets are used as an excuse to whine about their lot in life.

Listening to the daily meeting of Whiners International has absolutely no appeal to me.

All Regrets Aren’t Bad
Perhaps a touch of sadness occasionally is connected to a regret:  not clearing the air with someone, sadness over a harsh word spoken, or embarrassment from a previous time in your life.  Here’s the twist that many people miss – you can still do something about those issues.  It almost always starts with this step:  swallow your pride and talk to the other person.  If they’ve gone on ahead, take a few quiet moments and tell them anyway…they’ll hear you.

How About You
Are you a charter member of the self-pity club?  If so, you’re not only annoying the hell out of everyone around you; but, you’re also doing a major disservice to your health.  Take the first step and reach out to someone for help.  And then dump those regrets for good.

I’d love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

pic courtesy of mississippigarden


  1. Self-pity? bad, agreed. Regret? Not always bad... I'm thinking that feeling bad about a wrong decision does lead to introspective, which in turn triggers "learning from the past" and potential mending actions.

  2. Thanks Rob...good points for sure. Learning is powerful, I just hope dwelling on past mistakes doesn't become an excuse for inaction going forward. Appreciate the comment!