I Walked Alone Into a Fight

Community - a unified body of individuals

Team - a group of people with a full set of complimentary skills

Network - an association of individuals with common interests providing mutual assistance

Friends - one attached to another by affection or esteem

Colleagues - a fellow worker or professional

Family - all the descendants of a common ancestor

So Much, But...
We have lots of words that represent the resources available to us in life, and these resources come in various forms. 

Ranging from close family relationships, to our loosely defined networks (think 3rd level on LinkedIn) it would appear that we have an endless amount of support just waiting to be tapped when times get tough.

Untrue.

While we do have extensive connections across many places, platforms and people; we fail to appreciate one of the most obvious facts of our journeys. 

We ultimately travel alone.

Not Bad News...
Now before you click out of this post and move on, consider the following...

...there is a reason communities, teams, networks, friends, colleagues and families are in our lives

...there is a reason, that despite feeling alone, we actually are not alone at all

Are you with me?

When you feel the pressure of your corporate life dragging you down.
When you feel like your career has stalled.
When you feel like the personal stress and strain are too much to bear.
When you fee like it is all just...too much.

Remember that although we technically travel alone, we have been provided with an amazing group of fellow travelers to share our journey.

What do you think?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses. 

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inspiration

Blessings

I'm not sure if you've noticed or not, but there is a heck of a lot of negativity in the world today. Political leaders don't talk to each other anymore, they simply retreat to the safety of their extreme left, or extreme right news networks and gripe about each other.

Often the world of work is no different. I hear the cries to be different, to embrace innovation, and to be more progressive. Then all of the close-minded biases raise their ugly heads and the organization (and it's people) suffer.

Work Blessings
As I reflect on the polarized world we live in, it strikes me that I have an awful lot to be thankful for in spite of all the noise. It's too easy to fall into the trap that everything around us is "bad."

That's simply not true.

While I may be repulsed at the behavior of our political leaders, I certainly have other leaders in my life who are nothing short of world-class. I work with a team of people who are committed to doing their best work every day...and it shows...as the results of their work has allowed my company to grow at a dramatic rate.

Personal Blessings
I am blessed with three incredible children, an amazing family, and close relationships that I wouldn't trade for anything.

I am a bit of a fitness junkie, and have discovered a passion for healthy eating and daily workouts that not only help me keep pace with my busy life, but help me feel great too.

The church I joined is an open, welcoming community of faith the treats every person with respect, no matter what their background or experiences may be.

Lastly, I live in a part of the world that can only be described as paradise.

How About You
Today I'm going to let all the folks caught up in their miserable, negative existence stay right where they are. There's no room for them. I'm too busy focusing on the incredible blessings all around me.

What blessings have you overlooked?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

It's Not Business...It's Personal

There is a never ending amount of pressure to deliver results in the world. Whether we work for a large company, a small firm, our church, coach a sports team, or have taken the plunge and work for ourselves, results are the endgame that connects us all.

I’ve seen many leaders (including me) who attempt to separate the business decisions we must make, from the feelings we have as part of that decision-making process.

Let’s call it…corporate justification for not caring about our team members.

Did that hit a little too close to home?

Business Is Important

One of my pet peeves is that leaders do not execute. I write about it a lot because I've collected so many examples of it over the years. 

"Many leaders are so afraid to fail, that they would rather focus their energies on saving their own butt, instead of making a real difference for their organizations or people."

Here's the core problem: under such pressure many leaders treat their employees with a cold indifference all in the name of "business."

Everything Is Personal
Now for a moment of self-disclosure. I put a lot of time, energy, and yes, passion into my work.

If things go poorly, I feel terrible.
If I am criticized for doing an ineffective job, I feel terrible.
If the team's work falls short of a goal, I feel terrible.

I take it all personally. 

All of it.

Newsflash! All of your employees take it personally too. They care about the work they're doing. They care about being successful. They care about getting ahead.

Newsflash #2! Your employees do not wake up each day trying to scam you. Get the hell over yourself and your pompous view of your team.

How About You
Maybe it's time we retire the phrase "it's not personal...it's business." What do you think? It seems to have worked as well as the old command and control behaviors that have destroyed the credibility of so many "leaders" our there. 

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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What Were You Expecting?

The world of work is changing so rapidly I almost feel out of breath trying to stay current. My love/hate relationship with my task list (love the tool...hate how many items are on it!), seems to have me chasing my tail every day of the week. What about other parts of my world? I don't think I'm trying to balance any more issues than the next person, but it does make me wonder if I'm doing something wrong.

What was I expecting?

The Way It Should Be

This issue has been weighing heavily on my mind lately...the notion of my expectations and others expectations of me. Should I conform to a particular view of how I should work, behave, or interact with them? Has the culture of my world shifted in such a way that I've missed something and I am out of step with the cadence of those around me?

Difficult questions to answer as I look at the world through my biased lens. (By the way, we all have our own lenses, which makes this an even more complex set of dynamics to work through.)

Sometimes what I've come to rely on turns out to be very different as I understand more about the new reality around me.

Time Out

In those moments we have to challenge ourselves and ask about our own expectations. What do we believe is in our future? 

Can we rely on what we've grown accustomed to; or, have we allowed ourselves to fall into a false sense of security based on what we "want to be true" vs "the reality of our situation?"

Difficult questions to answer.

How About You

What are your expectations for your world? What about those connected to you? Have you found the proper alignment and balance between the two; or, are you working to bridge a gap that has "suddenly" appeared?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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Defensive Listening

We all know what it means to get defensive. Typically there is a negative connotation, even though its really more about our survival instincts than something negative. If we feel we're being attacked, or criticized, we naturally get a little (or a lot) defensive.

At least I do...or should I say I used to.

Talk Is Cheap



Part of my job is to strategize the most effective way to handle very complex and difficult situations. I'm not talking about whether or not to launch a new product line, or to tweak the ad campaign. No, what I'm talking about are the behind-the-scenes, in your face, "thank God I don't have your job Jay" situations. 

I'm not good at very many things, but I do have a degree of confidence when it comes to these moments. These interactions are important. They affect people's lives on a very personal level, even though we often try to describe work as anything but personal.

It's just business! Really? Have you ever received difficult feedback and left the meeting clicking your heels because it was 'just business?' I didn't think so.

Listen First

When we're faced with the unenviable task of delivering critical feedback it is essential that we listen first. What is that? It means thinking ahead to what those words will sound like to the other person. It means getting over ourselves and putting the other person's self-esteem ahead of our own fears and insecurities about having to give this feedback. It means being so professional that you are one step ahead of yourself...let alone the other person involved.

How About You

Are you so caught up in the self-induced stress of delivering a difficult message that you completely forget about the other person involved? Are you capable of staying one step ahead of yourself to take your work, and your professional reputation to a whole new level?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.

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The Real Me

Game face.
Professional boundaries.
Opening up.
My "A" game.
Giving of myself.
Driven.
Focused.
Blah, blah, blah.

Sharing is Caring
I'm not type of person who keeps too many things inside. When I'm passionate about something it just spills out. It may be my work, it may be my family, or it may be my hobbies. But sooner or later, if it gets me fired up, those around me are going to hear about it. Since we all spend so many hours at our jobs, the people around me in the workplace definitely hear about it all...and then some.

But should they?

Professional Is Best...Right?
I've long espoused that we must maintain a level of professionalism in the workplace, particularly for those of us fortunate enough to be in leadership roles. Here's my dilemma: being professional all the time in no way comes close to the real me. Is that bad? I'm not sure. I do know it's real, so maybe I'm on to something.

Too Much Personal Is Bad...Right?

I've also thought for a long time that being a bit more fun and personal with those around me is the best strategy in just about every situation. Showing some personality, kidding around to alleviate the stress of the moment, and generally being a more upbeat member of the team just feels more natural to me. 

But should I be this way at work?

Finding The Balance

Jason Seiden has written some great material on the concept of profersonal relationships. I encourage you to check out his perspective on this issue. Putting all of these issues into practice however, changes the nature of our relationships with those around us. One way of finding our way on this journey could be, as Charlie Judy recently suggested, to develop our own Personal Board of Directors. It's an intriguing concept, and I'd love to hear if any of you have implemented this approach. I haven't taken that plunge...yet.

How About You
Do you think it's okay to share who you really are? Or, is it just simply safer to have a permanent game-face on that never comes off? I like to embrace my passions fully, which usually means my team at work hears a lot about social media, HR, and hockey. Can I go a bit farther and share my musical passions as well? Hmmm, maybe I should wait until I'm fully vested first?

I'd love to hear from you.

No Excuses.




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